I thought I'd compile a list of things that I wish someone had told me at the beginning of it all. I did attempt to nurse Gage as well as a baby, but gave up after a month. Whether it is your first baby or your 4th, there is only so much you can read about before actually having that baby.
1. My number one thing that I'd share with other mom's that are going to try breastfeeding is DO NOT BUY BOTTLES OR FORMULA. If you are going to try breastfeeding, give it 100% before deciding it's too hard and that you can't do it. The guilt I felt after stopping with Gage is still something I carry with me. It is unbelievably easy to give in to a bottle full of formula at 3am when your baby wakes up hungry and you are in pain from nursing. Having it in your home makes it that much easier to quit. I would have quit with Finn, easily, if I'd had bottles and formula in my kitchen.
2. Don't be shy about asking for help. Go to your family doctor, a lactation consultant, a midwife, clinics at the hospital, La Leche League. Just do it. Don't be shy. Nothing bad could possibly come from it.
3. It will hurt. I know there are some breastfeeding experts out there that will claim that "it shouldn't hurt" and "if it hurts then something is wrong". But really, it's only the rare few mom's that give birth, place that baby on their breast and have them latch on perfectly and off they go in perfect harmony. That is NOT the norm. There is an adjustment period where you BOTH are learning how it works and that adjustment period is HARD. Grit your teeth, get through it. It DOES get WAY better. Promise.
4. Invest in washable breastpads. I could not believe how far breastfeeding supplies have come since I gave birth to Gage in 2009. Breastpads especially have changed so much. I bought a brand called "Bamboobies" (http://www.buybamboobies.com/) and they are pretty amazing. They are comfortable, have night and day pads, and not overly expensive. I highly recommend. Not to mention continually buying disposable pads is really expensive.
5. Invest in a good cream. I never had much luck with the Lanolin type creams from the baby stores. I bought the Bamboobies brand online and LOVE it. It's certified organic, safe for baby and it WORKS. When the cream you bought doesn't work and you are in pain, ask your doctor/midwife to prescibe APNO cream. Dr Jack Newman compiled a list of ingredients into a cream that is anti-fungal, anti-bacterial and a pain reliever. You won't regret it. (and all doctors/midwives know about it)
6. Experiment with different holds and positions. In the beginning, some work way better then others.
7. Do not let the fear of nursing in public stop you from breastfeeding altogether!!! I can't seem to stress this enough. It makes me sad that mom's would consider not breastfeeding at all just because they don't want to "expose" themselves in public. There are some really great covers out nowadays (I have one that doubles as a cute scarf and drapes all over me so no one can see a THING) and if you do a little research, there are also wraps/carriers that make nursing easier in public. My moby is awesome for nursing in public. You can also buy nursing tops that make things easier, or dress in layers (which is what I do). I put a tank top on, then another shirt on top. When it's time to nurse, just sit, lift the first top up and pull the bottom top down and no one would see anything. Not to mention that if anyone stares or says anything remember that it is YOUR RIGHT to feed your baby. It is illegal to ask a nursing mother to leave or cover up. It is absolutely intimidating to do the first time, there is a moment of anxiety most mom's feel. But then you do it once and it gets better every time.
8. Invest in a decent pump. There will absolutely be times where you will want to have some time to yourself or sleep through the night. A good pump can help you achieve that and enable dad to spend some time with baby.
9. Do not use just any ol' bottle to feed baby that pumped milk. This was the mistake I made with Gage. Babies find it much easier to use a bottle, so when going back to the breast they have a hard time adjusting back to it (known as "nipple confusion"). Stu and I found this one bottle by Medela that is specifically for breastfed babies. It is not overly expensive and it has a nipple that Finn has to latch onto just like a breast. That way he can go right back to breastfeeding with no issues. *On another note* I personally would not recommend pumping and bottle feeding breastmilk until AFTER the first month or AFTER you get the hang of breastfeeding. Adding another element to adjust to is confusing and just too much. No to mention pumping does change your supply, so wait until it is already regulated before trying.
10. Go easy on yourself. In the beginning there are a lot of ups and downs and your tired, emotional, in recovery and adjusting to this new little bundle. I used to say it takes 1 month to get the hang of breastfeeding. Finn and I didn't get the hang of it until 2 months. It seems that most other mom's I've talked to about this said that it all of a sudden "clicked". One day it's miserable and the next it's awesome. And then you never have to look back and things are a million times easier!
11. Last and not least, buy some good nursing bras! I started off using those tank tops with built in bras (which were great in the beginning!) but 4 months later I use my nursing bras and find them to have the support I need and they are more comfortable to sleep in.
I know it's intimidating and scary and painful. So many mom's give up within that first month because no one warns you how freaking hard it is. I can absolutely guarentee that it is worth every single second of pain. Please remember that you are NOT alone! There are tons of mom's out there struggling and are having the EXACT same issues as you. Another change I noticed that wasn't around while I was nursing Gage was that there is so much more online support. I wish I'd found it while I was attempting to nurse Gage, I remember feeling so alone in my problems with him. Here are some helpful links:
www.theleakyboob.com
http://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/4615093/ShowForum.aspx (The Bump has an online community where mom's can find breastfeeding advice from other mom's)
http://www.nbci.ca/
http://community.babycentre.co.uk/groups/a2975/breastfeeding (online community for BabyCenter)
I also found YouTube videos super helpful. Just search for "Breastfeeding help" or enter whatever specific problem you are having.
This product was also a big lifesaver. http://www.mymilkies.com/ It collects the milk that leaks from the opposite side you nurse on. You can collect a ton of milk this way without pumping!
I hope this helps a mom struggling with breastfeeding or prepares a mom about to try. :)
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