Me Time

It took me 3 years, but I finally figured out how to be a positive influence in my children's lives, and how to be happy.

I need time to myself, on a regular basis.

I know from experience that most mom's have a difficult time making themselves a priority. They put their children, housework, their husband's, pets and other family members before themselves. It's easy to forget to recharge your sanity!

I've said it a million times before, being a mom is the hardest job in the world. Whether you are a working mom, or you stay at home. It is HARD.

We need to take a time out, regularly, so that when we go back to wearing the "mom pants" we can handle the tantrums, the whining, the negotiating, the housework, the cooking etc. If we don't get time away, we end up pushed to our limits, and NO mom is a good mom then. It's ridiculously hard to keep it together.

You don't need a whole day away, or hours away, just time to yourself each day for 5-10 minutes. I know there are single mom's out there that don't have a partner to rely on for help, but it IS still possible. If your kids nap, make yourself a tea and just sit and breathe. Watch a girly movie. After the kids are in bed, have a warm bubble bath. If you can find a sitter, go for a walk with the dog, go window shopping with a tea. The possibilities are endless!

I know it's hard to imagine, and I know mom's that work a lot of hours per week that say "When I'm home I just want to spend time with my kids". But you know what? That ISN'T normal. You don't win mom of the year because of that.

We change after becoming mother's, in a HUGE way. In a lot of ways, we forget who we were before and we think to ourselves "I lived so selfishly!". But we need to be selfish again! It is what makes us "mom of the year". Our children will enjoy us more!

My experience started as a kid. My mom was a stay at home mom well into my teen years, and she NEVER (still doesn't ) take time for herself. She put(s) everyone first, and doesn't leave enough time for herself. She is stretched very thin most of the time. I started off motherhood doing much of the same. But you know what? I found it overwhelming, stressful, anxiety-ridden and exhausting. I learned it absolutely does NOT have to be that way.

Now I take time each day for myself. When Finn goes down for a nap, I make myself a hot tea and I sit and relax and breathe deeply and I watch a movie. In the evening when Stu comes home, I go for a walk around my neighborhood with Max. I sit and read a book. I ignore my household chores.

Because when I'm old, I don't want my children to remember me as the mom who's house was spotless, all the time, who was frazzled, impatient and yelling all the time. I want them to remember a happy mom, who was fun and took time for herself so she could love them more.